How to Get Help for Your Marriage (90 Second Read)

Daniel Crosby • June 13, 2023

Day 10

So you’re discontent in your marriage. You’ve been wrestling with it internally for a long time and it’s finally reached the breaking point. What now?

This is where illicit affairs creep in or spouses are blind sided with divorce papers out of the blue.

Here are three steps to keep from getting to that point.

1. COMMUNICATE – If you haven’t gone to your spouse, looked them in the eye, told them, with words, out loud, in person that you aren’t happy with the way things are then this is your 1^st step. Your marriage will never get better if you’re unhappy inside your head but never tell your spouse. They can’t change something they don’t know about even if you’ve tried sending subtle or not so subtle signals.

2. RESOURCES – Find resources to help create change. Some spouses will ignore your pleas. They don’t think there is a problem and you’ll be left to try to find relief on your own. That’s ok. You can still find resources to help you with the emptiness in your marriage. This might look like books, seminars, or getting involved with a church group to find support.

3. COUNSEL – Last but not least, go seek counsel. This could look like a friend, a pastor, or a counselor. Again, you don’t have to have your spouse on board to get counsel. It’s easy to get stuck in your own head because you’re the one going through this. Don’t go through it alone. Go say it out loud to someone you trust who isn’t right in the middle of it.

HOMEWORK: If you know your marriage is struggling and needs help take action NOW. I hear this statement all the time: “Daniel, we probably should have been here talking to you 3 years ago.” Please reach out for help before giving up.

As always, if you’re stuck then don’t hesitate to reach out to me personally. I help couples reconnect every day and get back on track to having a marriage they’re excited to go home to.

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Depression and Nutrition (Part 2)

By Daniel Crosby • September 29, 2025

Depression + Nutrition (PART 2) Ok, so I took all the fun away from eating junk last time. So let’s talk about things that are good fuel for our bodies. 1. Lean proteins: Fish and chicken provide good lean protein which boost our longer term energy and keep us from crashing later in the day. 2. Leafy Greens: Rich in folate, which is linked to improved mood. 3. Blueberries: High in antioxidants and may help protect against oxidative stress, which can contribute to depression. 4. Sweet Potatoes: A good source of vitamin B6, which is involved in the production of neurotransmitters like serotonin. 5. Avocados: Rich in healthy fats and nutrients that can contribute to overall well-being. 6. Dark Chocolate: Contains antioxidants and may improve mood. When you’re eating these foods, you have to get up off the couch to prepare most of them. You just achieved a goal by creating a meal. Now you’re proud of yourself because you did something healthy which helps yourself talk. Now you can share a good recipe with a friend which creates socialization. It all works together! Homework: How did the Yuka App from last week work out? There were probably some surprises in your pantry. This week, look up a healthy recipe, cook it, and notice if how you feel eating something healthy. Bonus: Here’s a fun recipe my wife and I like to cook, especially in the winter months when we’re hankering for something fresh. Sweet Potato Bowls: Roast whole sweet potatoes in the oven until you can stick a knife through it easily. (Should take close to an hour depending on the thickness of the potato Cut open and hollow out the potato into a bowl (It’s going to be really hot!) Top with scoop of black beans – we buy the canned ones (heat on the stove while potatoes cook) Add toppings: ½ Sliced avocado Halved cherry tomatoes Chopped onion Chopped cilantro Sour cream or a drizzle of ranch dressing Salt and pepper to taste

Depression and Nutrition (Part 1)

By Daniel Crosby • September 22, 2025

Depression + Nutrition (PART 1) Today we’re talking about the obvious. If you eat crap you’re going to feel like crap. I’m not preaching at you. I do it to. No shame here. I would eat a family sized bag of chips everyday for lunch if I could. The way we feel is directly tied to what we eat though. It’s like fuel for the car. If you get some bad fuel it’s going to mess your engine up. So what are some of the things killing us? 1. Energy drinks - • Horrible for depression! They’re full of artificial chemicals and they cause you to spike and then crash. I have clients who are legitimately addicted to these just like someone is addicted to cocaine or heroin. 2. Marijuana - • It’s not really a food unless you’re using edibles, but I’m tired of people trying to convince me that marijuana is good for you. Marijuana might be one of the biggest contributors to your depression if you’re a regular user. • Warning: If you’re taking depression or anxiety medication while using marijuana, your brain is probably the most confused thing on the planet. 3. Ultraprocessed foods - • This is pretty much anything sold in a gas station or anything that has an expiration date of more than a week or two. If it hasn’t been cooked the day you ate it then it is probably not contributing positively to your brain chemistry. Homework: Download the Yuka App. It’s free, you can scan any barcode, and it will tell you how healthy a food is on a scale of 0-100. It will also make recommendations for healthier alternatives for low scoring foods. It’s a lot of fun to play around with in your pantry.

Depression and Self Talk

By Daniel Crosby • September 15, 2025

Depression + Self-Talk Can you hear that little voice in your head? It’s the one when you’re at the grocery store and you were supposed to get 3 things and you can’t remember the 3rd thing. “Dang it, what was that last thing that I needed to get? It wasn’t milk because we have milk. Was it something in the produce section? Ugh, I can’t remember.” Psychologist Ethan Kross write a book about this called “Chatter.” Chatter is when normal factual self-talk changes to darker more accusatory and judgmental words. “You screw everything up. Can’t you ever do anything right?” “No one else struggles with this and here you are frozen and stuck in it doing the same stupid thing over and over again. You’re so pathetic.” Chatter is only going to fuel your depression. Here are 3 ways to quiet the chatter in your head: 1. Separate FACT from ASSUMPTION – • It can only officially be a FACT if someone else has literally said it to you. I heard a quote recently that said, “Imposter syndrome is the fear that other people are judging you as harshly as you are judging yourself.” They aren’t. 2. Identify Negative Beliefs and where they came from – • Negative Beliefs sound like “I” Statements. “I’m not good enough” or “I’m unworthy of love.” You might want to find a good counselor to help you work through these. 3. Journaling – • Write down a response to your own chatter as if you were responding to a friend who came to you asking your opinion about their inner voice. We’re usually kinder to others than we are to ourselves unfortunately. Homework: Take 60 seconds and think about which Negative Belief seems to pop up in your head most often to keep depression alive and well? We all have at least one. What’s yours?