Anxiety: Asking for Help! (90 Second Read)
Daniel Crosby • January 23, 2024

One of the hardest things to do is admit that we’re struggling and that we need help.


Remember that mask that we’ve talked about in other articles? Asking for help requires that we voluntarily take our mask off and admit that we aren’t a superhero.


It’s vulnerable because it conveys weakness and need. It’s a confession that we don’t have it all together.


Human nature is bent toward autonomy and independence. Have you ever met a child who was learning to tie their shoes? When you are in a hurry and they are painfully, slowly, trying to tie them by themselves, you offer to help but are met with the screech, “No! I can do it myself!”


I say it all the time, “The thing that’s worse than hurting is hurting alone.”


Here are 2 reasons it’s important to ask for help:


1. Without asking for help, I cheat myself out of the valuable wisdom of others.


There is growth and humility in asking for help. I’m admitting that I don’t know everything. We’ve become less humble as a society. We prefer to Google our symptoms and treat ourselves rather than going to a Dr. and trusting their expertise. There is so much wisdom all around us so why wouldn’t we tap into that to achieve a better outcome?


2. Without asking for help, I cheat others out of the joy of helping.


Anytime I ask people what they’d love to do for a dream job they usually say, “I just want to do something that makes a difference and helps people.” We are helpers by nature. Maybe this is our “strength in numbers” tribal instinct. Whatever the case, rejecting someone’s ability to help weakens us and it weakens them. Everyone wants to contribute. Why not help someone else out by asking for help and letting them use their gifts?


Homework:

1. The next time you are frustrated, check yourself and ask if your stubbornness is keeping you from asking for help.

2. The next time you ask for help, consider the good feeling it gives the other person to help you.


Every day I help hurting frazzled people by walking with them as they get back on the path toward becoming who God created them to be. Shoot me an email if there’s anything I can do to help you or someone you know.

"Uncomfortable" Book Review

By Daniel Crosby • May 7, 2025
“Uncomfortable: The Awkward and Essential Challenge of Christian Community” by Brett McCracken is a great book to read if you’re a church person or if you’ve become somewhat detached and frustrated with the church. McCracken challenges all of us, conservatives and progressives, to think about the WHY behind Christian community and one of the fundamentals of finding the WHY is approaching it with humility. Maybe you having it your way and telling everyone else they’re wrong wasn’t exactly what Christ had in mind when He instituted the church. iPhones and iPads seem to have morphed into iChurch in a sense. American culture has turned Christ’s church into a business that caters to our comforts aesthetically, relationally, and politically. It’s made us consumers, critics, and reviewers of the Church rather than servants of THE Kingdom. It’s not wrong to have preferences and to like some things better than others. Music, décor, and speaking style are all over the spectrum at different churches, but he argues that the point of picking a church and serving in it should be less about does it meet my needs and more about whether I’m showing up and using this place along with this group to glorify God. He annoyed me in parts because he steps on my toes but maybe we need that a little more often. If you’re disenfranchised with the status quo and you feel like it’d be good to be challenged about church then go grab “Uncomfortable” by Brett McCrackin.

Look for Beautiful Things

By Daniel Crosby • April 28, 2025
Look for beautiful things when you're restless, uncomfortable, or on edge. There's something about acknowledging the good around us that helps us reset and realize that it's not all bad. If you're struggling to see beautiful things in the world, come see me and we can talk more about it. www.danielcrosbycounseling.com

"The Needs of the Heart" Book Review

By Daniel Crosby • April 24, 2025
“The Needs of the Heart” by Chip Dodd is a book that will blow your mind. When I picked it up, it’s a very small thin book. Less than 100 pages. I assumed I’d breeze through it in a couple of hours. About a month later I finished digesting it. The truth is we cannot fully live the life God has called us to unless we acknowledge that we do have needs, that these needs are good, and discover the healthy ways of meeting these needs. Chip takes common human needs like Security and Accomplishment and he unpacks what they really are pointing us to in his typical concise but brilliant depth. There’s no fluff here. With chapters just 3-4 pages each, you’re going to want to have a highlighter ready to underline, to ponder these topics, and maybe then to discuss them with someone you know and trust. You’ll come away from this book with a deeper sense what is already fulfilled within you and ones that might be lacking where you need to go do a deep dive with a lot of prayer and introspection. If you liked Chip’s book “The Voice of the Heart,” this is one is your next read. Go grab “The Needs of the Heart” by Chip Dodd.